All good things must come to an end ....Goodbye S.E.A 🙏

I'm back in Bali, in Ubud, known as the cultural centre of Bali. I have a 30 minute walk from the drop off point to the hotel. This allows me to grab an initial sense of the place before I decide how I spend my time here. Coming from the car free Gili islands it's a shock to be engulfed in the business of the town centre. I've not missed cars and bikes! I trudge up a long steady incline and am met by a funeral procession. There are hundreds of people to weave through which requires extra physical effort with the back pack....I'm sweating! They raise the corpse enclosed in a netted stretchered carriage and run down the street past me chanting. It's weirdly lovely seeing the community together like this. Once I'm settled in, the hotel owner tells me how everyone knows each other here and in villages beyond and how the community control and fund the towns and villages contributing charitably relative to a persons circumstances, with subsidised events put on for children and lower earning families. Locals are elected by the community to run for council and there is never fraud committed as the shame this would bring on that individual and his family would finish them (I'm not convinced by this).

It's a family run hotel and as I'm on the same level as their home, the moment I open the door the man wants to strike up conversation. This soon begins to grate when you just want to enjoy breakfast in peace. 

The reviews online about this place are outstanding with a lot of emphasis on the family and how wonderful they are, but I see something quite different soon after my arrival (I wish I didn't). The husband is a short well groomed, handsome and suave man, he loves to talk and the world to see him and hear his voice....he's simply too much for me and I cannot warm to him even though he's 'flawlessly' nice to me. I sense he knows I can see through him which seems to make him try harder to like him, but his efforts are futile.

His wife is plain, skinny (undernourished) andher face is grey. She's weary, humble, dignified and scurries around like a mouse, but her motions are slower than they should be, she's downtrodden. I sense her deeply unhappy energy when she's close and see emptiness in her eyes. As I quietly observe from a distance I can see this woman living in the shadows of her husbands controlling, domineering ego and chauvinistic beliefs. She's surrounded by people but sad and lonely inside. I just want to hug her, feeling sorry she's trapped like a slave inside a loveless eternity. Just Being near her makes me sad.

The one thing I've really been looking forward to in Indonesia is the trek up Mount Batur. This is an active volcano which last erupted seriously in 1963 and wiped out the village below. There have since been murmurs in the seventies and 2000 but these were just smoke and rumblings.

The day arrives and I'm picked up at 2am and after a few hotel pick ups we arrive at the start at 4am. It's pitch black as our group head off with hand torches in search of the summit and sunrise. As I look above there's a black blanket studded with bright twinkling stars, ahead is a swirling ribbon of moving torch lights weaving up the volcano, underfoot is black volcanic dust a loose rocks which are tricky to navigate through. It's not a tough trek but I'm loving it all the same, it's a shame the pace was hindered by the amount of tourists but I make the best of the moment. We sit on the summit and watch the slither of sun raise its head at 6.24am, gracefully rising into a shining ball of golden light revealing the beautiful route we've walked, magnificent sights for as far as the eye can see, mountains, volcano's, the enormous crater with volcanic steam making its way from below the earths crust through any weak opening and the blackened crusted lava tracks down the side of the volcano resting in a gigantic circular pool at the base where the village once stood.....it's a tremendous and unforgettable sight. It makes your existence on this planet feel such a small contribution in life's big and natural picture. This landscape redeems Bali for me.

6.20am ....The waiting game 

Here comes the sun... in all her glory!!

These little critters caused mayhem stealing food...I hate them!

Steam from the below ground activity....there she blows!

The black lava where the village once stood.

A guide tells us the history and advises they believe in their religion (Hindu) there are 'gods' for everything. They regularly have ceremonies at the top of the volcano and throw live animals (pigs, cows, goats, sheep etc) into the crater as an offering to the 'volcano God'. They truly believe this will bring them luck and keep them safe. When I decided to come to Bali I thought I would revel in the peacefulness and bliss of the spiritual balance promised here. Over my few weeks in Indonesia I've been fascinated by their religious obsessions and it does make you question your own beliefs. I don't see God in a 'form' but believe there is something out there making me agnostic. Here however every god (and there are hundreds) has a form which can be a good or evil spirit. They try to 'balance' both by offering a flower to the 'good' god and candy or rice to the 'destroyer' god in simple offerings they leave outside their homes. The small temple within each home is said to contain the spirit of ancestors. The have community ceremonies at temples for the 'good gods' and conduct activities such as cock fighting for the 'evil/destroyer' gods in the wider community. It's bonkers, they are completely brainwashed and at the surrender of their forced beliefs, it dominates their existence with days being consumed by creation and presentation of ceremonial offerings which litter the town. They are controlled by fear, of karmic consequences not realising the learnt behaviour has created essentially a culture now consumed by obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD) it's craziness and far too much to be deemed sane behaviour. They are humble, pleasant and friendly people. I respect fully their dignified culture, there is a lovely serene and calming feel about Bali. What I'm not feeling is the western tourist trying to 'be like them' and believing by following their beliefs they are enlightened and more superior beings, that part is fake for me. 

Next up ....white water rafting! 18km fast flowing river run east of Bali in the regency of Karagesam set along the Malaga Waja River. It was such good fun, I really got into this, the surroundings were beautiful and the atmosphere electric with the thrill and splashing fun between boats. As you ride the river the local children splash you from the waters edge. I see two adults and young boys carrying their rubber tubes heading up stream to catch the fast pace of the river. The boys are about seven years old and naked (a normal sight in S.E.A.) For fun as we float past I raise my paddle and splash them expecting them to return the gesture. Instead the boy sticks his tongue to the side off his mouth, grabs his privates and gestures a masturbation sign.....WELL!, I wasn't expecting that, my face was a picture!! Fantastic fun and a good workout...I was shattered at the finish. 

Setting off in the morning we're blocked in by a duck parade...we had to sit and wait for them to waddle past ...ahh funny.

visiting a coffee plantation on the return journey. This elderly lady is grinding the coffee beans.

Sampling the tea/coffee...lemon grass tea was my clear favourite. 

Next day I did a 20mile cycle tour (all downhill) from Mount Batur to Ubud. The scenery once again is beautiful, a really pleasant day in the sunshine. There were ceremonies being held in villages we passed through and I couldn't believe what the women can carry on their heads.

I mean seriously!

After lunch the traditional dancers perform for us.

Ubud is a pretty little place, roses around the doors of plush restaurants, wooden carvings, hippy clothes, incense  sticks smouldering and yoga are in abundance, it seems even sanity can be bought for the right price! If I think of Ubud now I think earthy browns, harvest gold and deep luscious greens flecked with striking reds and pinks from oriental magnolia type trees. Commercially this town's community has done a grand job 'reading' the tourist and creating a hardworking and profitable business plan set around spiritual balance and peaceful beings, but they've pushed things slightly too far and seeing a best western, Starbucks etc affirm to me it's selling its soul out.

Outside of the town is where Ubud comes alive with spectacular temples, natural landscape with land being 'hard worked' as far as the eye can see. I've enjoyed my time exploring four days in the countryside. There's undeniably a serene and calm fee about Ubud once your out of the hustle and bustle of the uninspiring town and I can understand its appeal for the lost soul .....who is guaranteed to have it mended or buy a shiny new one here! 

Lunch at the local Pomegranate Restaurant, open air in the middle of the rice paddy.

On the journey to Seminyak (my final destination) the driver takes a detour (making a full day tour) to a few land marks. Firstly to the Taman Ayu Temple, then an hour north to Jatiluwih into the heart of the rice fields for a little trek through the paddies and lunch. The surroundings are breathtaking, I could have stayed there forever. The final destination of the tour is to Tamalot, a temple accessed via a causeway (accessible only when the tide is out), this was very pretty but you weren't allowed to access the temple and it was uncomfortably rammed with tourists. I received the holy water blessing but for some reason this seemed to make me develop tourettes! (....or perhaps this was the overcrowding of the place ha ha).

Taman Ayu Temple

 Trekking through the rice paddies in Jatiluwih

Receiving a blessing ....or was it a curse?!

Tamalot Temple

I spend the final days chilling in Seminyak, west of Bali. On arrival I felt like I was on the east coast of the UK, it strongly resembled Skegness to me. The beach was a big open expanse filled with beanbags, lanterns and partygoers. I also had a walk to Kuta, knowing this was 'party central' but felt being so close i should go and catch a glimpse, and yes i can confirm this was just as tacky, set sole around teenage drinking and strongly resembling Blackpool. It was nice to catch a glimpse of it all but neither Seminyak or Kuta had the vibe, or atmosphere of other far superior party zones i've visited (i.e. kohsan road (Bankok),  Backpacker Street (Ho Chi Minh City) or Gilli T.....they're just 'wanna be's'.

Seminyak Beach

Constant hassle from 'Cheap Cheap' traders

Well if you can't beat them ......

One thing I've really missed in Indonesia is a good meal. In my time here I've only had a couple of good dishes but overall the food seems unimaginative, unseasoned and bland. Towards the end of my time here I'm feeling radgy at the lack of flavour and the cravings for salt and sugar kick in and by the end all I can think about is food....this was a real disappointment.

Finally after 130 days my time in south east Asia is over, I can't believe the time has come to say goodbye. I've loved it and it's forever going to have a special place in my heart. It's invited, nurtured and steered and guided me  through each wonderful and vastly different country, culture, history, traditions offering an anonymous crutch in the most challenging of circumstances (language barriers, solitude, lone vulnerability, navigation etc). It's led me to some of the most beautiful sights I've ever seen and nurtured and matured me into a stronger woman. Thank you for keeping me safe, for keeping me humble, for sharing your beauty and for demonstrating how much happiness and dignity can be found in simplicity. 

Big change now....New Zealand brace yourself I'm on my way! xxx